YAY, IT’S STORY TIME!

Once upon a time in a financially unstable land far far away, there was a drug dealer (let’s call them EMI for the sake of this story) who owed their drug dealer alot of money. But drugs just weren’t selling the way they use to.

EMI’s drug dealer (let’s call him CitiGroup) was so fed up EMI they called them up and said, “Look bitch, you own us alot and I mean ALOT of money. Pay up or your dead.”

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[audio:http://OhhSoFamous.com/Music/Michael Jackson - Beat It.mp3]

Luckily, EMI was also a pimp and had some prostitutes that could help him raise the money needed to stay alive. EMI’s bottom bitch (say.. Terra Firma) was much much prettier than all the rest and EMI knew this. He talked to Terra Firma every day, motivating her to do her best and raise the money so they could still be together.

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[audio:http://OhhSoFamous.com/Music/Eddie Murphy - Party All The Time.mp3]

Terra Firma knew what she has to do, she loved EMI so damn much. She went out there and whored harder than she’d never whored before but they were still short. The day of the deadline was near approaching and they began to panic.

Was this going to even work?
What if they didn’t make the money in time?
Or worse… what if EMI was killed? No… we musn’t say such things.

Finally the day of collection came. This was it. They began counting their money again to make sure they hadn’t made a mistake. Could this really be happening? Terra Firma had done it. She had raised enough money to save EMI’s life and they could finally be together!

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[audio:http://OhhSoFamous.com/Music/The Proclaimers - I Would Walk.mp3]

Unfortunately… this was not the last time EMI owed money to the wrong people. Not even a month later EMI needed to pay another $365 million to a previously opened UK chapter of his organization and the troubles did not stop there.

In a failing economy where business models of the past proved no longer viable, EMI failed to develop innovative, forward thinking ideas and was killed in March of 2011.

Terra Firma settled down in Nebraska and got married. No one knows the whereabouts of CitiGroup. Please contact the proper authorities if you have any information regarding this murder.

~Ohh! So Famous!